Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity -
twice.
Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
Chuck Norris once won a game of Connect Four in 3 moves
Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's fucking beef
Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice out of a lemon
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird
Chuck Norris secretly sleeps with every woman in the world once a month. They bleed for a week as a result
Showing posts with label chuck norris facts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label chuck norris facts. Show all posts
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Saturday, June 5, 2010
chuck norris facts
I gathered the best chuck norris facts on my opinion i'll gather some more every day
- If you can see Chuck Norris,he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
-Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
-There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
-When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion, one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
-China was once bordering the United States, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it all the way through the Earth.
- If you can see Chuck Norris,he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
-Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
-There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
-When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion, one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
-China was once bordering the United States, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it all the way through the Earth.
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